Triple Take #18: Neck tension, using voice to change the mood, scent as a cue for calm
- Kaffy Rice-Oxley
- Jul 28
- 4 min read
Voice Confident's Triple Take - your fortnightly trio of tips!
Voice: release neck tension
Did you know that tension held in the neck can have an impact on your vocal tone - and lead to voice fatigue?
The worst thing for this I find is a day of zoom calls.
On an 'in person' day, I might be walking from car to building or from one room to another, I might be panning round a room with my head to make eye contact with different people, I will generally be moving around a fair bit.
On a day in the home office, where I'm just switching from working on the computer to calls on the computer, I can be seated a lot, and have my head in basically the same position for a long time.
But it's super easy to relieve that tension and free up the muscles in your neck for easy voice production:
Drop your shoulders away from your ears, like you are fitting your shoulder blades into the back pockets of your jeans.
Slowly take your chin to your chest, then back up, then chin to the ceiling, then back to centre. Repeat.
Slowly take left ear to left shoulder and back up, then the other side. Repeat.
Look a little to the left, tuck your chin and take your nose towards your left armpit and back up, then the other side. Repeat.
Twist your neck so you are looking over your left shoulder, hold for 10s and bring and back to centre, then the other side.
Then, shrug both shoulders up to your ears, hold for 3 seconds, and roll them back and drop them away from the ears. Repeat.
Nb. Keep movements smooth and gentle — no forcing or crunching!
Presence - change the mood with non-verbals of the voice tone
If a conversation starts to heat up - whether it's tension, stress, or just too much intensity - one of the simplest ways to dial it down is to use the non-verbals of your own voice tone. Specifically: lower your voice, slow your pace, and join your words together so the tone is smooth - think late night radio DJ!
It’s surprisingly effective. When you soften your tone, it signals calm. It gives the other person space to breathe and reflect, rather than react. You're not just changing the volume, you're shifting the energy.
People tend to mirror what they hear. So if you stay grounded, chances are they’ll start to meet you there too.
This doesn’t mean becoming passive or backing down, it just means choosing to de-escalate so the actual message has room to land.
So next time things get tense, don’t push harder. Speak slower and lower. It might be all you need to get the conversation back on track.
Confidence - scent as a powerful calm cue
Those who read my newsletter regularly know I write a lot about using the senses to reduce anxiety - the more we can bring our minds back to the now, via our bodies, the easier we find it to get perspective on our thoughts.
My own 'desk favourite' (for that email I just don't want to open, or that piece of work I just can't face starting...!) is a wrapped soap.
Kew Gardens does the most amazing range; they are sold in National Trust type places and garden centres. I have a Magnolia and Pear soap on my desk which works for me in four ways:
It's a beautiful scent. Scent is a powerful 'pattern interrupt' for the brain and brings me instantly into the present moment.
I take a long slow inhale through my nose to receive the scent. If my breathing has become shallow without me noticing, this brings me back to relaxed breathing.
I bought the soap last year on a trip with my extended family to Raby Castle in the north-east where I grew up. So it holds both recent and long happy memories for me; recalling this occasion interrupts my brain patterns and changes my mood.
I have been using this soap as a 'calm cue' for the past year. So my brain knows that when I do this - I pick up the soap, I take a few deep relaxed breaths with it - it is time to feel focused, clear and calm about the task ahead.
On Saturday I went to Chatsworth in Derbyshire and bought a new soap in the same range - Apricot Vetiver. It's an energising scent and I will probably keep using my Magnolia for calm and this one for when I need to wake up and bring some energy to my next task!
(P.S. If you are an anxious person who carries a handbag - I highly recommend a small wrapped soap for your bag. Train yourself up by taking deep breaths with it when you are calm. Then in a stressful situation you will find it an instant calm cue!)
